Cursed

[pontalovr]

GOD DAMN IT! That's it. I'm cursed! There's just no escaping it. None. Why?! Why did it have to be him! Why couldn't it have been someone that just sort of looked like him! What the hell is it with my family?! Do we automatically become perverts when we turn 30 or something?!

Oh god.... I've got six years left...


No. No NO NONONO!!! I DON'T WANT THIS!!

Comments

[shh-im-talking.livejournal.com]

You can't pick your family.

Maybe disown them so what they do ceases to affect you?

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

I know that. You don't think I don't?

...it's not that easy. If it was, I would have. But I can't. Unlike some people in my family, I don't run away from my responsibilities.

[shh-im-talking.livejournal.com]

I never said you should run away. Just side-step the insanity.

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

Same thing, different words.

[shh-im-talking.livejournal.com]

If you say so.

[wildtechnique.livejournal.com]

WHat happened??

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

......I found out what Ryoga's been up to...

Kin-chan, think you can do me a favor and run me over with a bus before I turn 30?

[wildtechnique.livejournal.com]

what's he been up to tha has you so upset?

um... I don't know how ta drive...

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

...He's doing adult movies.

Then pick one up and throw it at me?

[wildtechnique.livejournal.com]

you mean like horror movies not meant for kids?

S'long as I don't break your arms and legs you got it!!

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

No. And please don't make me say it...

Right. Just sometime before I'm 30 and my life goes to hell.

[wildtechnique.livejournal.com]

I don't know what you want to say so how could I make you say it??

Are you sure its gonna go like that?? Maybe you won't be an actor if you retire!

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

Porn. Okay. Porn. He does movies of him having sex with people! Which I really Really didn't need to click past on the way to the Tennis channel

I don't want to be a pervert like dad and him...

[wildtechnique.livejournal.com]

....

[wildtechnique.livejournal.com]

I WON'T LET YOU BE LIKE THAT KOSHIMAE!!!

[wildtechnique.livejournal.com]

Not EVER !!!

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

Kintarou...thanks a lot. I know I can count on you.

[wildtechnique.livejournal.com]

Ryoga's so... so... so dirty!!

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

It's just disgusting and now I've seen for myself...I can't get away from it. It'll happen to me....and I don't want it to.

[acrobatichemist.livejournal.com]

So how'd you find out about them anyway? Did ya watch one?

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

No. I was flipping through channels, looking for the Tennis Network. I thought I saw Ryoga and I knew he said he got this great job in Hollywood.

I thought it was a normal movie... I changed the channel as soon as I could but I know Ryoga when I see him.

[acrobatichemist.livejournal.com]

... There's a tennis network?

And you have porn channels on your TV?

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

I'm at a hotel in Australia. Of course there are both those channels...

[acrobatichemist.livejournal.com]

... Don't you have to buy the porn channel?

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

I'm in the best room in the hotel. I think it just comes with it. It's not like I wanted to see it.

[proinpink.livejournal.com]

What happened? Did your creepy dad do something? Do I need to threaten him with a racquet? I can do that if you need me to.

[ihavetits.livejournal.com]

Yeah, what happened?

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

I'm cursed to become a pervert.

[ihavetits.livejournal.com]

Really? How so?

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

Grandpa was probably a pervert. Dad's a pervert. Ryoga's a pervert. That means...

[ihavetits.livejournal.com]

Being a pervert isn't hereditary!

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

Shall I point you back to my family...

[ihavetits.livejournal.com]

That's just bad luck!

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

I don't believe in luck

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

....not my dad. My brother. Just as bad really. No...Worse. Much worse. Means I can't get away from it. Ever. It happened to Ryoga...It'll happen to me...

[proinpink.livejournal.com]

I promise we will have Words if you ever do anything perverted.

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

You can just help Kin-chan hit me with a bus...

[proinpink.livejournal.com]

I don't have a driver's license either though...

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

Cheer him on while he picked it up and hits me with it...

[proinpink.livejournal.com]

I would rather we didn't plot your eventual murder.

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

You're not murdering me. You're saving me from a fate worse than death. And not just me. You're also saving all those people I might end up perving on. You'll be a hero.

[tennis-no-ko.livejournal.com]

I would volunteer to help with the kill-you-before-you're-thirty thing, but the newspapers might have a field-day with that.

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

They would laud you as a hero of women everywhere. The papers would send you in for national prizes.

[tennis-no-ko.livejournal.com]

Nooope, I'm pretty sure they'd just say I'm taking out the competition.

For the record, this fate is too hilarious to ever want to kill you.

[mount-tezuka.livejournal.com]

What happened?

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

Look at the other comments. Kind of hard to miss. My family is full of perverts and I'm cursed to become one too

[mount-tezuka.livejournal.com]

I...see.

I would like to point out that neither of them suddenly became perverts at the age 30. Your father especially, judging from Ryuzaki-sensei's stories, had a much, much earlier start. Perhaps you've inherited your mother's morals, genetically speaking?

[madamadapro.livejournal.com]

I think he was born that way...But Ryoga followed him. And he's dad's kid from another mom, so... I don't know. All I know is that I really really don't want to be a pervert like those two. Ever.